*.* disappointed... *.*
.
How come we must face so many emotions?
Why must so many of them be negative?
DISAPPOINTMENT!
A huge word with a huger impact....
I'm really disappointed in 3 people; I guess I'm kind of hurt by them :(
2 are other people...
and the last, is me......
If anyone out there has a job vacency for pathetic people, I'd probably be the first person they'd look for...
Why am I so weak?
So fragile?
So vulnerable?
So....terrible?
I can't cope with my work, I just lost one of my best friends in school for a completely unknown reason...probably cos of the cherlyn-helen teasing, my teachers are saying stuff about me that are not really pleasant; me eng teacher says I have no potential in Lit, my Chinese teacher says my Chinese isn't good enough, my bio teacher rejected my proposal for project (if I don't manageto convince the whole department to let me do the project, I have to start from scratch again), and my physics teacher says I lack confidence...maybe that's true...but I can't really help it right? I want to place at least 50% of my time for church, but my eng teacher (also the teacher in charge of IP totally opposes that, and thinks that nothing else is more inportant than school and how good my English is)...and I feel kind of miserable in school nowadays... Can't wait to get out of that environment every day... feel trapped and unhappy...
And I think the same thing every day....
Where are my friends?
Why can't I spend more time with them?
Why must they all live in the east?
And most of all...
Aren't I supposed to be trusting God every day?
Why am I relying on my own emotions to get through each day?
What's wrong with me?
How long more must this test from God last?
Why is it so hard to be a Christian?
Me blogged @ | 8:23 PM
Tuesday, January 25, 2005
*.* renewed *.*
.
Tai hao le! Wo zhong yu xiang tong le! :) ok fine...let's try that again...
Yay! I've finally thought things through! :)
Bilingualism...highly encouraged and recommended...haha...but most of you wouldn't bother..haha...
Anyway, that isn't my point of writing this....
Well, it's a normal school day again...
But with a different attitude within me :P
Let's see...
Started the day with biology...covered homeostasis...yay! It's a cool topic...and I never knew our skin was so complex, but anyway, go read it up if you like... (for non-bio students)
After that was Chinese...shucks...forgot to bring my own stuff to study, so had to pay full attention, and my teacher has this thing about calling me to answer questions...so sad...good thing today she didn't really realise that all the answers she wanted were all found on the materials she gave us...haha...so I could answer properly for once :)
Anyway, it was time for recess...had japanese teriyaki chicken don...pretty nice...but I wanted to self study some maths so I basically gobbled the food down (good thing no indigestion)
And Maths lesson finally arrived...yay...had a quiz (pretty common for a teacher like mine) on all the techniques of differentiation...I sort of revised after she finished teaching quotient rule and higher derivatives yesterday, so I managed to get everything correct lah...but I couldn't do the bonus question :( Must try harder...yup, and today we started on the applications of differentiation, approximity and all that. Pretty cool, but don't understand fully yet. Must keep practising...
Later on we had physics SPA...not the relaxing one, by the way, Science Practical Assessment...mainstream don't need to do...such fortunate people...anyway, today was session 2 of SPA skill 4(planning our own experiment for a given question) so were were supposed to execute our initial plan and see whether it worked...and if you are smart enough to guess, of course mine didn't work! haha...expected lah...didn't even understand the question...no choice lor...just fail this section and hopefully will do better in session 3...
Finally, Chem...wah! Quantum theory...yes it's not O-level syllabus...they're supposedly preparing us for A-levels so we have to cover that lor...we just finished it though, after 3 long weeks of getting severe brain damage...why? that's cos everything we learn from Sec 1 to Sec 3 is wrong! sigh...re-learn again and again... Today, though, we soent most of the time covering the periodic table, O-level stuff, but with a different perspective due to Quantum theory...it's easier to grasp lah...but still a lot to learn...
I will survive! :)
Just leave you guys with soemthing more meaningful...
1 Peter 5:8-9 ~ Be controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you kow that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of suffering.
No matter what each of us are going through, no matter how heavy all our burdens are, nothing is too heavy or impossible for God to handle :)
Take care!
Me blogged @ | 2:28 PM
*.* hope *.*
.
as the cliche line in stories goes...
in the midst of darkness, where nothing seemed to go right, a glimmer of hope suddenly appeared before their very eyes...
yup, cliche as it is, somehow it's true. Honestly, I find myself slipping into depression very easily... Sometimes, hard as I try, I can't seem to be 'the light of the world, and let my light shine before men so that they may see my good deeds and praise my Father in heaven'...in fact, sometimes I see no difference at all :(
but there's something I've been reminded to hold on to...my hope in the Lord. Faith. Thought it was something impossible to have, but now I know; seeing isn't believing. That is but physical... when you can believe in something you can't see and are sure it is true, that force is a lot more powerful...a force that began with the love of God and this love goes on forever... through me and onto others as well, who will, hopefully, pass this love on...
Hope.
Lord, guard my heart, so it'll never fade...
Me blogged @ | 10:10 PM
*.* reflections *.*
.
When is He coming?
What do I do in the meantime?
I want Jesus to come down quickly so that I can be with Him in heaven forever and forget all sorrow, pain, suffering and sadness...but...what about people who don't believe? I know where their final destination is, but...can I bear to see my friends go there? NOOOOOOO!!!!!
What am I supposed to do? How many people would actually believe that something big and either awesome or devastating is going to happen? How much can I do? Who would believe? The Bible already states that very few people will open their hearts to accept...but I have to keep on trying... If only...if only all my friends would understand the urgency of this...
Aaaaaagggghhhhh! Troubled...... what if time runs out and they still don't accept God's love for them?
To all Christians: Are you going to stand at the gates of heaven and watch your friends enter the depths of hell?
I don't know... How can my happiest day also be the saddest day for so many?
Me blogged @ | 7:13 PM
*.* tsunami *.*
.
hey! I know it's kind of late and slow to talk about the tsunami and all, but as the coomon question goes, "If God really exists, where was he in this disaster? Why did he allow this to happen?"
I'd like to refer all the Christians to Genesis 50:20...by the way, it's about the story of Joseph... so in this verse, he says, "you intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives." Though the 'lives' he was talking about there was the physical life, it really applies in the tsunami incident too, but this time, it's the soul that God's trying to save...
For those of you who don't already know the stroy...it's story-telling time!!! Whee :)
Once upon a time... ok that's crap...
Well, a guy called Jacob had 12 sons (from 4 different women), out of which, the 2 youngest were from the women he actually loved, Rachel. His favourite son was one of the two, Joseph. He favoured Joseph more than any of his other children...and so, one day, he gave him a richly ornamented coat. Of course, Joseph's brothers were very angry...but they were even angrier when Joseph told them he had a dream that all of them were tying sheaves of grain and then his sheave suddenly stood upright while the other sheaves bowed down to it. He even made his father angry when he later told the family that even the sun and moon and stars were bowing down to him.
With this anger and hatred, his older brothers plotted to kill him one day. This was the day when all of the 10 of them were grazing on a field and Joseph was sent by his father to check on them. When his brothers saw him coming, they plotted to kill him, throw him into a well, and then tell their father that he was eaten by a ferocious animal. Only the oldest son Reuben, was against the idea. He pleaded with them to just throw Joseph into the well and leave him there (then he would come back later to rescue him). However, not long after Joseph was thrown in, the brothers saw some people who were going to Egypt. They felt that they would gain nothing out of killing Joseph, so in the end, they sold Joseph for about 0.2kg of silver...
Lots of things happened to Joseph in Egypt...he ended up being favoured by Potiphar (one of the pharaoh's), who bought him as a slave, because God blessed Potiphor's household when Joseph was serving him. However, Potophor's wife soon noticed him and asked him to sleep with her :( Eew... anyway, he obviously rejected he...but she ripped her clothes and screamed, saying that he took advantage of her...so... BOOM! he landed up in prison!
Anyway, in there he interpreted the dreams of two prisoners...a cupbearer and baker. He told them that dreams belong to God, so he could ask God for the meanings of those dreams... and they told him their dreams. Joseph interpreted them and true enough, all he said came true. The cupbearer was sent back to serve Pharaoh, while the baker was executed... but the cupbearer totally forgot to tell Pharaoh about Joseph, until one day, Pharaoh had 2 disturbing dreams. The cupbearer finally told him that there was a man who helped him interpret his dream and it came true. So pharaoh sent for Joseph!
Once again, Joseph consulted God to ask for the meaning of Praraoh's dreams, and guess what? Both said the same thing! They meant that Egypt would have seven good years of harvest and then seven years of terrible famine throughout the land. Gasp! yes I know...haha... Anyway, Pharaoh put Joseph in charge to collect all the food and store them for seven years to prepare for the famine. With this, Joseph became the second in authority in Egypt! Wow...
Seven years passed, and the fame finally came, just as God had told pharaoh in his dreams. Everyone must have been so happy because there was so much food even during a famine. :)
Well, even though Joseph's family wasn't living in Egypt, their food level was so low that they were starving :( They decided to venture to Egypt because they heard that Egypt had lots of food. Joseph's 10 older brothers were sent to get food.... yes and a lot of things happened again... they didn't recognise him and all, and he sort of forced them to bring Banjamin, his younger and real brother, to them otherwise they would not get any more food after that. And obviously, Jacob wouldn't allow Benjamin to leave because that was the last of Rachel's sons...but when they had no more food, he had no choice :'(
Anyway, after all his brothers came, he finally revealed hinself to them, and all of them wept happily... (so ironic..haha) But when Joseph's brothers asked him to forgive them, he simply said that even though they wanted to harm him, God took this disaster and transformed it to something that would save the lives of so many people :)
There you have it...so no matter what happens, even if it's bad, God will use it for something good :) Jeremiah 29:11 ~ "For I know the plans i have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future."
God bless you! :P
Me blogged @ | 11:28 AM
Saturday, January 22, 2005
*.* stuff *.*
.
hey! The weekend's finally here! Yay!
Had a good time today hanging out with The Bunch...haha...actually, we are as wacky as bananas, so the name can fit lah :) P.S. I still can walk :P
Anyway, tomorrow's a working day for me...so sad... But other people have to do it too...so I guess got to accept it...unfortunately.
But Sunday's coming! Yay! Definitely a day to look forward to! Somehow, even though I know that on that day, it's hard to study and that might mean poor results...but...church and worshiping God just seems to have a higher importance... :P It's eternal...
Oh yay! Next friday there's going to be something exciting happening too! For me lah...haha... I'm going to be mixing sound for the Sanctuary for the special service... Smile :) So exciting! Ok I'm going a little crazy over here...which is why I'm part of the bunch :)
To end this off, I just want to say, have a great weekend and also for the week ahead. God bless all of you...
John 3:16
For God so loved the world that he gave his
One and Only Son,
that whoever believes in Him
shall not perish but have
eternal life :)
God bless.
Sayonara...
Me blogged @ | 12:37 PM
Thursday, January 20, 2005
*.* cip, plans for weekend *.*
.
hey! just doing this for a while before i embark on a journey to the music room for choir :)
Well, yesterday, I went for CIP to the Kwong Wai Shiu hospital for old folks. No, we did not really interact with them (thankfully...I can't speak dialect)...we helped to slip in business reply slips for the brochures to ask for donation. And guess what? With my puny hands, I did more than 1500 in 2 hours! haha...yay! I'm not lying, by the way. Each box has 500, and I did 3+...so yup... When we left the hospital that day, some of my friends received this tract from a nurse there :) It is aimed at the more Chinese people...with the front cover showing the character "fu" or blessing. Then it slowly talks about the blessing from God inside, so...I thought it was pretty cool :P
My plans for the weekend (from tomorrow, actually): tomorrow, there's ian's and daryl's farewell lunch, before they go to australia to study. Daryl: to go there for the 1st time, and ian: going back for his final year (equals to j2?) Anyway, I don't even know where we're going...just somewhere in the east. Sigh...long journey again... worth it? I guess so :)
Saturday: Choir in the morning from 10:30-1, rush to jurong east library to discuss more SIA projects with my group(lunch? may not eat, i guess...), after that, probably study all the way till evening and then come home for dinner. Wow.... how absolutely delightful and exciting... :( My school life is boggling my mind every day...
Anyway, on a brighter note (still to do with school lah), I finally learnt differentiation! ok fine, I'm maths and bio-crazy, but who cares? :) So I shall read ahead some more then won't be blur in class..haha...for the past few days, me, plus some other people who self-learnt ahead or had tuition, were not really with the class during maths..we were doing the shortcuts and going many questions ahead, but Mrs Chua didn't mind :P how nice! She just leaves us alone, and then answers any questions we have for the next segment when the rest of the class are working on the problems...cool way of learning..highly recommended if your teacher is nice :)
And for the bio part, we finished 'Excretion' today. It's a cool topic and highly interesting, unless you're anti-bio, of course. Besides that, I've done quite an amount of research on the Brain! Pinky and the brain, the pinky and the brain. One is a genius, the other's insane! :) Anyway, it's a lot to learn, but strangely enough, intriguing... :)Yay! ok...I'm in a good mood...
Gotta go now...choir's in 4 min. Bye!
Me blogged @ | 2:35 PM
Wednesday, January 19, 2005
*.* God's standard *.*
.
Why do I believe in someone whom I can't see?
Why am I the way I am?
Who am I?
How many people in this world believe in God? If it's 1% of the world's population, then I'd like to ask, out of this 1%, how many people believe in Jesus Christ as God's son and as the saviour of the world? Probably about 0.2%... Is it because we believe in some God that does not really exist?That it'll only take time for us to switch to a different religion? Or that God is not worthy of our worship?
None.
I can't see Him, I can't feel Him and I can't hear him, but a silent force draws me to Him each and every day of my life: His love. God doesn't appear to us, because if He did, we would die. Our sin has separated us so much from God that most people don't realise that their final destination is at the opposite of heaven: hell. There will be people who ask, "Why is it so unfair? How come people can't have their own religion and then go to heaven? Why is there only one way? Why is Christianity so selfish?" How do we answer them?
What I know is, God is in heaven. Jesus came down to this earth to die for everyone. For all who receive Him, to those who believe in His name, He will give the right to become children of God.
It's as simple as that. How do we even know that God exists? My friend once asked, ""What if we die and then realise that there is no heaven?" The answer lies in faith. Now faith is being sure of what you know of and certain of what you do not see. We can't see heaven. We can't see God. But there's something we forgot to consider; if God doesn't exist, how come I've felt Him? How come someone like me, who needs proof for everything, would believe in a God I cannot feel physically?
Forgive me for being incoherent.
I can't fully comprehend the way non-Christians feel. As far as I know, I've been a Christian for as long as I remember, and I don't remember a time when I didn't know about God. But I know there was a long period of time that I didn't know God personally. He was just some foreign character that the teachers would talk about, but I felt I didn't need Him. Not to run my life, anyway.
Then things happened.
School life. I don't exactly remember why, but I was a pretty horrible person :( And for that, I got exactly what I deserved. All my sisters would gang up against me, my schoolmates and classmates probably disliked me to the point where hatred set in, I was made fun of and insulted almost every day. ..
Life was torture.
In the midst of so much hatred and secular feelings, only one source of love appeared without me knowing it: the love of God. How? I don't know, neither will I probably ever know, but it seemed to set in naturally. In Primary 5, God became real to me. For once I bothered to get to know him personally, not as my God, but also my friend and Heavenly Father. And even though I had said a prayer to receive Christ many years before that, I said it once more, this time meaning it with all my heart...I was a child of God, and I always will be...
Of course, the horrifying days weren't over just yet, and I still went through a lot of discrimination and ostracism up to the end of Sec 2. But there was something different: wherever I was, no matter what was happening to me, He was there; every step of the way...
(You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives. Genesis 50:20)
Why am I the way I am? Because of how God has moulded me over the years. Over a really short period of time, He's blessed me with so many friends, out of which, I believe, most of them will be forever :) Out of everyone I know, I'd probably have to say that a particular group of people have made every day of my life such a blessing: The Bunch :P Most of you probably won't read this (thankfully), but I really cherish every single one of you, even if you call me kojipun, your shrink, or a radio that spouts verses...you guys are a really special Bunch. Thank you for letting me pun so many things that you say; my English is improving every day! (it rhymes! :P) And to everyone, whether I've known you for one day or 16 years, I really hope for all of us to have the strongest foundation in our freindship: Jesus Christ, and that our friendship will last for the amount of time beyond human comprehension.
So who am I? I'm not Cherlyn, because that's only my name. I'm not Singaporean, because that's my nationality, I'm not Chinese, because that's my race. I'm a child of God, and this is my identity.
What's yours?
Me blogged @ | 4:50 AM
*.* free lunch *.*
.
hey! I passed my test today...He didn't test me all 52 sets though... anyway, I got a free lunch... but i think more than that, I've also learnt the importance of hiding God's word in our hearts. What if...one day, the anti-Christ manages to gain enough control of the world to burn all the Bibles? We need to guard the important message of salvation, as well as assurances, words of encouragement, and God's important message in our hearts.
have a blessed day :)
Remember: God loves each and every one of us. He died for all of us, not just for Christians. He's waiting for you to acknowledge Him as your personal Lord and Savior. Everytime someone accepts Christ, the heavens rejoice, and the Christians are filled with joy. The one who receives the most though, is the one who accepts Jesus into his life... This is my wish for every single one of my friends, especially some very special people I got to know...
So...please...I could give you so many things, but the thing I want you to have the most, is Jesus Christ and salvation...
Me blogged @ | 9:55 PM
Saturday, January 15, 2005
*.* verses stuff 2 *.*
as of now, ladies and gentlemen, I've done more than 34 verses...less than 18 left :) Teng Ngan....get ready :P
Me blogged @ | 6:05 PM
*.* verses stuff *.*
17 down...many more to go...yes, it's 2.05 in the morning, and I'm pretty much dead now, but I've nailed 17! Yay! Teng Ngan, I'll be testing you too...haha
Me blogged @ | 6:06 PM
Wednesday, January 12, 2005
*.* Growing old *.*
hi, by the way, just wanna add...
I'M GROWING OLD!
Today, when going down from my classroom for flag raising, I tripped on the stairs and fell...haha... don't know lah...was paralysed there for a while, then slowly got up and hobbled down...then in the evening when I was crossing the nanyang-HwaChong Institution overhead bridge, I tripped and almost fell again...haha...something's wrong with me...
Me blogged @ | 11:24 PM
*.* Verses *.*
Hey! If you're feeling down, or happy, or angry, need an encouragement or you really have nothing to do, these are very important verses that you might like to read (only if you want to). I can almost gurantee that quite a number of verses apply to each of your lives. If you think there are more important ones that I've left out, feel free to tag the reference. One of my aims this year? To memorise the whole list...
Matthew 28:18-20
Then Jesus came to them and said, "All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Threfore, go and make disciples of all nations, baptising them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to do everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age."
Psalm 119:105
Your Word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path.
Psalm 119: 9-11
How can a young man keep his way pure? By living according to Your Word.
I seek You with all my heart; do not let me stray from Your commands.
I have hidden Your word in my heart, that I might not sin against You.
I Peter 5:7
Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.
Romans 5:7-8
Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
1 John 1:9
If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just, and will forgive us our sins, and purify us from all unrighteousness.
2 Peter 3:9
The Lord is not slow in keeping His promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.
James 4:7
Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.
2 Timothy 3:16-17
All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.
1 Timothy 4:12
Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.
1 Thessalonians 4:3-4
It is God's will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body, not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God.
Colossians 1:16
For by Him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by Him and for Him.
Philippians 4: 6
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:13
I can do everything through Him who gives me strength.
Philippians 4:4
Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!
Philippians 1:21
For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain.
Ephesians 6:13-17
Therefore put on the full armour of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God.
Ephesians 4:26-27 ~ In your anger do not sin; do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.
Ephesians 5:18-20 ~ Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit. Speak to one another in psalms, hyms and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.
Ephesians 2:8-9 ~ For it is by grace that you have been saved, through faith--and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God--not by works, so no one can boast.
Galations 5:22-25 ~ But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such, there is no law. Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit.
Galations 4:14 ~ The entire law is summed up in a single command: "Love your neighbour as yourself."
Galations 2:20 ~ I have been crucified with Christ, and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.
1 Corinthians 13:4-7 ~ Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily- angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Romans 12:1-2 ~ Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God--this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is--His good, pleasing and perfect will.
Romans 8:38-39 ~ For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Romans 8:1 ~ Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.
Acts 1:8 ~ But you will receive the power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth.
John 14:6 ~ Jesus answered, "I am the Way and the Truth and the Life. No one comes to the Father except through me."
John 13:34 ~ A new commandment I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this, all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.
John 3:16 ~ For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life.
John 3:17 ~ For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through Him.
John 1:12 ~ Yet to all who received Him, to those who believed in His Name, He gave the right to become children of God.
John 1:14 ~ The Word became flesh and made His dwelling among us. We have seen His glory, the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.
Luke 1:37 ~ For nothing is impossible with God
Matthew 18:20 ~ For where two or three come together in My Name, there I am with them.
Matthew 16:24 ~ Then Jesus said to His disciples, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me."
Matthew 11:28-29 ~ Come to me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rests for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.
Matthew 7:7-8 ~ Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.
Matthew 6:33 ~ But seek first His Kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.
Matthew 6:19-21 ~ Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.
Matthew 6:14-15 ~ For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your Heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.
Matthew 5: 14-16 ~ You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead, they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in Heaven.
Jeremiah 29:11 ~ "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
Isiah 40:30-31 ~ Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.
Provers 3:5-6 ~ Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and he will make your path straight.
Psalm 139:23-24 ~ Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.
Joshua 1:8 ~ Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful.
Joshua 1:9 ~ Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified, do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go
Leviticus 19:11 ~ Do not steal. Do not lie. Do not deceive one another.
Genesis 50:20 ~ You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplishwhat is now being done; the saving of many lives.
Genesis 1:1 ~ In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth.
That's the end...for now...oh yes! Just like to leave you with the lyrics of "Everything to Me":
I grew up in Sunday school, I memorized the golden rule,and how Jesus came to set the sinner free.I know the story inside out, and I can tell you all about the path that led Him up to Calvary.But ask me why He loves me, and I don't know what to say. But I'll never be the same because He changed my life when He became...
(CHORUS)Everything to me, He's more than a story, more than words on a page, of history,He is the air that I breath, the water I thirst for,and the ground beneath my feet, Oh, He's everything, everything to me.
We're living in uncertain times, and more and more I find that I'm aware of just how fragile life can be.I wanna tell the world I've found, a love to turn my life around.They need to know that they can taste and see.Now everyday I'm prayin, just to give my heart away.I wanna live for Jesus, so that someone else might see that He is...
And lookin back over my life at the end, I wanna meet you, sayin you've been..
(CHORUS)Everything to me, He's more than a story, more than words on a page, of history,He is the air that I breath, the water I thirst for,and the ground beneath my feet, Oh, He's everything, everything to me.
Me blogged @ | 12:36 PM
Tuesday, January 11, 2005
dark clouds loom over
troubled waters
a mind and heart, confused as
one.
The only unity I have
Wishing wells have
DISAPPEARED
everything lost, none to comfort a
f a d i n g soul...
A glimmer of hope?
Where?
There's nothing here or
anywhere
I can't give up, but I can't move on
Everything's
MOVINGSOFAST
I can't catch---------------- up
A Gift
I received
To listen...........my friends know
But as I
SHrink away
Darkness creeps
I'm not heard
Am I the only one
A L O N E
to listen?
help........................................................................................................................................................
Me blogged @ | 9:53 AM
*.* the experiment *.*
Don't really have time to write. Just gonna post my 1914 word essay. Tragic story.
The Experiment
"That's strange. Jack normally starts bawling at this time of the night."
"Maybe he finally decided to let us have some rest for the first time in two months. Come on, let's spend some quality time with each other, okay?" Alan coaxed, stroking his wife Anne's hand. But before he knew it, Anne jumped out of bed, her eyebrows suddenly furrowed. "Something's wrong. I know it." She rushed out of the room, into the next, and within seconds, a scream pierced through the house. Alan, who originally sank back into bed awaiting the return of his wife, sprang from the bed and raced to his wife's side.
"He's … he's not breathing! Not moving! Drive to the hospital now! Quick!" she squeaked.
The entire journey to the children's hospital was filled with silence, yet within the panicking parents, no peace could be found. Thoughts clashed in their minds, and all they could hope for was a chance for their only child to live.
Would Jack survive? Yes, yes, Alan and Anne both silently willed.
Would he die? No, that could not be possible, not after they had gone through so much to have this baby, after the doctors had already confirmed that Anne could no longer give birth.
Upon entering the hospital, Anne sprinted to the first nurse she saw, Jack beginning to turn cold in her arms. "Save my baby!" she pleaded. "He stopped breathing just now!"
"Follow me. I'll get your baby to a doctor right away," the nurse instructed. Alan caught up with the two women, and they strode down a corridor quickly. Just then, a middle-aged doctor started walking towards them, and he was stopped immediately by the nurse. "Doctor Conners, their baby isn't breathing. It might be SIDS"
His eyes widened, and he instructed the nurse in a stern manner, "Get the baby into the emergency room now."
Five minutes later, Alan and Anne paced about at the entrance of the emergency room. There was nothing they could do, but wait, and hope for the best. "We've got to calm down. The doctors know what to do. Jack will be okay," Alan reassured his wife.
"Calm down? How can I do that? The nurse said he had SIDS! I don't even know what that is!"
"Anne dear, just listen to me okay? Sit down. Everything will be all right."
An excruciating fifteen minutes later, Doctor Conners finally emerged from the room. Alan and Anne searched for a sign of hope in his eyes. Any sign.
There was none.
Instead, he looked gravely at them and said, "Mr. and Mrs. Smith, we've confirmed it. Your baby had had SIDS, or Sudden Infant Death Syndrome. I'm sorry, we tried our best."
"How could he die? You're lying to me!" Anne shrieked hysterically as she scrambled onto her feet and shook Doctor Conners hard, but inside, she knew that all her hopes, every bit of it, was gone.
"Anne! Calm down! I'm sorry, doctor," Alan started. Doctor Conners gave him a sad nod and turned around to leave. Anne collapsed into a heap, her heart shattered with sorrow and guilt. "How could I just let him die? Why didn't I check on him earlier? Or notice anything wrong? Why did Jack have to die?" she blamed herself harshly. Alan knew that Anne was completely inconsolable. He got down on his knees and hugged her tight, whispering comforting words into her ears.
That day, the hospital was a graveyard for the Smiths.
Three days passed, and the life in the household seemed to have vanished completely. Anne hardly got out of bed, and Alan never left the house too. His boss had kindly let him take two weeks off to spend time with his wife and to prepare for the funeral. Why weren't we given a chance? Alan thought miserably. I'd give anything to have Jack come back to life. Anything at all...
A ring of hope sounded through the house. "Hello?... Yes, I am. Are you serious? Yes, yes! We'll be there. See you at four." Click.
For the first time since Jack's death, Alan smiled. "Honey! Listen! We're going to have Jack back again. All we have to do now … "
"Don't lie to me! You said everything would be all right. You promised, but he still died! I'd like to live the rest of my life in peace."
"No! Wait! I know we may have lost him, but I promise. This time, you won't be disappointed. Trust me. Please." Anne looked at her husband in the eye, and asked a last time, "Really?" With a confident smile, Alan took her into his arms and replied, "I promise."
At four o'clock, the Smiths were seated in an office, and facing them were two very serious-looking men. The discussion between the four carried on for two hours, and by the end of it, the couple that exited the room were a complete contrast from that of the previous days. The weariness and sense of loss had almost disappeared, replaced with a new hope and joy. They still had to wait, but this time, Alan and Anne knew the wait would be worth it.
Time passed.
The scientists had worked painstakingly every day for the ten months. Now it was finally time. For a miracle.
Once again, Alan and Anne travelled to the scientist's laboratory, this time hoping to return home as a complete family. On the way, a wave of apprehension swept over Anne. Will this really work? Am I ready to set myself up for more disappointment? What if something goes wrong? She wondered.
Upon reaching the office, they met the same scientists, but instead of the grim faces that existed previously, the scientists were actually grinning. "Congratulations, Mr. and Mrs. Smith. The whole process was extremely successful. When we compared him with the photograph you provided, they looked exactly the same. You may bring him home today," Mr Andrews informed the couple.
When Alan and Anne set their eyes upon the cloned baby lying in the cot, their eyes were filled with tears of joy. Suddenly all doubts that ever existed seemed to vanish instantly. This was Jack: her child. Anne picked him up and cradled him, whispering, "Jack, you've finally returned to me."
"As we told you before we began the cloning process, this is our experiment, before we open this technology to the rest of the country and of course, start charging money for it. Take this baby as our present and blessings," Mr. Reagen said.
"Thank you. Thank you so much!" cried the couple in unison.
The Smiths returned home that night, and their house was once again filled with life and energy. From then on, there would be no more complaining of waking up late at night to attend to Jack's needs. Their happiness was now complete, and that was all that mattered.
The experiment of two brilliant scientists had become the life and final piece of the jigsaw puzzle in a family. Everything seemed perfect. What could possibly go wrong?
Every month, the scientists called the Smiths to check on the progress of the baby, and good news never failed to reach them. The couple would describe in explicit detail something new that Jack had learnt to do, and the excitement in their voices was evident each time.
One day, when the phone rang, Anne rushed to it and picked up the receiver eagerly. "Hello? Mr Andrews!... Yes, Jack's been absolutely wonderful!... No, nothing's wrong with him. In fact, he started talking yesterday. He called me 'Mummy'! Can you believe it?... No, there really isn't anything abnormal; he's developing very well. Oh! He's crying now. I have to go. Goodbye, Mr. Andrews!... No, there isn't any mistake at all. Goodbye." Click.
Back in the laboratory, the figure of Mr. Andrews crumpled in his chair. Why wouldn't she listen to me? Mr. Andrews thought to himself miserably. This has been a terrible mistake. How could I have allowed such a thing to happen?
Two weeks passed, and the scientists had made numerous futile attempts to warn the Smiths about Jack's fate. Even a personal visit to the Smith's residence could not send an urgent message to the unsuspecting parents. Now, the news would come to them hard. Very hard.
One fateful day, Jack suddenly started sneezing. Little did Alan and Anne know that this was the beginning of the end.
The trip to the doctor's proved to be useless. The medicine did not seem to helping at all. In fact, Jack's illness got worse and worse each day. Finally, the couple had to send him to the hospital, and they also called on the scientists for help. However, instead of the reassuring words they were hoping for, the two men started panicking, each too afraid to break the news.
"We, " Mr. Reagen started. "We tried time and again to tell you. It happened to the animals we experimented on recently. There is a problem with the production of new cells. All the body systems, they will shut down one by one. I'm so sorry, we tried to tell you. "
"How can this be? He's already more than a year's old. There was nothing like this before! How could you do this to us?" Anne cried, overcome with grief, almost to a point of hysteria.
"I know nothing we say now can take away the pain that this is causing you, but when we chose to clone your baby, it's because Doctor Conners told us how much your baby meant to you. All we wanted to do was give you a new hope. We never meant for this to happen. We're really sorry," Mr. Andrews explained apologetically, tears glistening in his eyes.
The next two months were torture for the Smiths. Day after day, they watched Jack slowly slip away, at the same time enduring excruciating pain as his body got weaker. Yet all the parents could do was to wait for the day Jack breathed his last. For once, they even wished he would go soon, so that he would no longer face so much suffering.
The day came.
Alan and Anne stood at the side of the cot in which Jack was lying. Anne wept openly, unable to bear the sight of her baby strapped up with tubes. Suddenly, for the first time in days, Jack opened his eyes. The life in him was almost gone, and he seemed to be fading away, but something seemed different. He was trying to say something. Anne quickly pressed forward to listen, and just in time, she heard the faint utter of his voice, "Mummy". His last word.
Tears of joy and sorrow filled Anne's eyes once more, and this time, Alan joined in. The constant high-pitched note indicated that Jack's heart had stopped beating. Another tombstone was laid that day in the same graveyard, with the name Jack Smith carved on it.
Were the two years with Jack worth all the pain they had to go through again? The Smiths were inclined to say no, but yet they could not. Every precious moment spent with Jack was worth everything they felt, and even more than that. Nothing, including death and pain, could take away everything shared between the parents and the child.
Was the experiment a failure? Technically, probably yes, but it also taught the Smiths the value of life, its fragility and vulnerability, as well as the meaning of hope in someone you love.
This love: irreplaceable.
Me blogged @ | 12:37 PM
Tuesday, January 04, 2005
*.* school update *.*
Hello everyone!
Nothing much to write today...just a whole load more of projects again :(
Anyway, in case you think that IP's relaxing and non-stressful...you're wrong!
Last I heard, we have to get 2.0 and below for our msg to get promoted to jc. Besides that, the wonderful SIAs also play a part in making us more miserable. It's back to projects and portfolios again. Just for your info, the portfolio is supposed to replace our 'O' level cert, in the sense that our growth and development as a student is charted through our work, as well as the reflections that we have towards everything. And I mean, everything. We have to do reflection after reflection, all have to have quality(insightful stuff) as well as quantity, and everything is supposed to be self-initiated. Most of our projects, as in exactly what to do, are decided by us and yes, again, it's supposed to be student-initiated(hence the name)... Oh well, as the adults would say, "take it all in your stride", or "don't do it the last minute." haha...that's what my father used to say too, until he went on to take his Masters recently, and had to do projects too. So, in conclusion, life in IP is just as challenging and tough. Must pull through...
By the grace of God, I will...
Me blogged @ | 7:48 PM
*.* School!!! *.*
(P.S. Read the entry before this one too)
Hey! It's back to school!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Am I happy? Don't think so...but it's not much of a choice, lah. Just that this year, I'm going back with a new reason and attitude...and purpose too.
Anyway, time for the details of today's EXCITING programme...right...
I changed form teacher........so sad....really liked my last year's one, but she got promoted :( now the teacher in charge for Sec3 IP, and acting HOD for humanities...guess I shd be happy for her...bye Miss Teo...we'll miss you. Come back and visit us ok?
Anyway, I got my new timetable. For all of you who are used to having 2 recesses, bear with me. It's my first time...haha!! so we basically have 2hr of lessons in the morning, have 1/2 hr break, another 2hr of lessons, 45 min break, and then 1 hr lessons...yay! Which mean we end school officially at 2pm every day. :) Of course there's the underlying stuff like Student-initiated assessment(SIA) consultation, and CCA and all, but other than tt, think they're really following the "teach less, learn more" scheme, which is not bad..
Aiyo, I have no idea whose idea it was, but they just had to change the simple "English" to "language arts"! Sigh...think they were quite bored. Either that, or the teachers felt overly creative...haha...anyway, most of my teachers are the same, so tt's good, cos most of them, to me lah, are one of the best in their field :) Let's see...
Lang arts: Mrs Seah Hui Yong
Integrated Maths: Mrs Grace Chua (heehee...I'm bias towards maths :P)
Higher Chinese and Chinese Culture: Mdm tye Seck Moy
Physics: Ms Ang Wee Ling
Biology: Mr Derek Tan (haha...another more well-liked subject n teacher)
Chemistry/Form teacher: Mrs Susan Chew
Yup, those are the more important ones. Well, for those of you who think today was EXTREMELY boring because there was nothing to do but admin stuff, please... you were fortunate...besides all the normal admin stuff to cover, we also had lessons, and...we were given homework, plus some of our SIA tasks and all. Work on the first day of school! What's this world coming to??!! Sigh...never mind. Should have expected that anyway. After all, I'm now one of the senior citizens of the school, and this is NY. So, hope you all have a pleasant week ahead, and for all those taking 'O' levels, don't fret. Just keep trusting the Lord, and you'll be fine :)
God bless you. See ya!
Me blogged @ | 8:41 PM
*.* essay *.*
heh heh sorry...know this blog has been quite dead...busy lah...sorry
Anyway, this entry is on an essay I wrote. Read on.
By the way, it's also the one I wrote to submit to my very anti-Christ teacher.
"S.O.S!"
Devastating headlines splashed all over newspapers worldwide in the last few days of the year 2004, crying the same news over and over again. The unexpected earthquake that registered nine on the Richter scale had caused tsunamis to form, resulting in the loss of more than a hundred thousand lives. As the news spread like fire across hundreds of nations, people mourned and many were rendered helpless as they awaited news of their loved ones.
But I weep for the victims, not just because they have lost their lives, but because many of them have also lost their souls to the devil. So many people all over the world try to provide humanitarian or monetary aid, me included, but deep down inside, all I can say is, "if only... if only I could have offered them eternal salvation, or the love that God has poured on me. If only..." If they had known the Lord, this is where their suffering would have ended.
And it's definitely not over for us. Nations will rise up against nations, people will betray even their own friends and family, and more disasters like famines will strike thousands. People will claim that they are Christ or prophets, and Christians will be persecuted and put to death. However, these are just the signs; the wake-up call. Later, when the time comes, 'the sun will be darkened, and the moon will not give its light; the stars will fall from the sky, and the heavenly bodies will be shaken.' The earth will be completed destroyed by fire, and God will make the final judgement at the gates of heaven, destroying and punishing the ungodly men. At that time, who will be able to save their souls?
Therefore, no matter how much I am rejected or condemned by man, I will fulfill The Great Commission. With my life, I will work to save the souls of people, no matter who they are.
The time is almost up.
How safe is your soul?
Me blogged @ | 7:10 PM